Tired

I’ve been experiencing a massive sense of humour failure this week. I have been wicked tired, as they say in Boston. The problem was too much training without enough rest days. I was shockingly exhausted after Saturday’s workout and should have rested Sunday but didn’t, Monday we had the finals of the quarterly challenge at the gym, and then Tuesday was team practice when what I REALLY needed was a rest day. I spent all day dreading going to the gym, which is a good indication that I really need to rest. Luckily the team workout was super fun, and I felt better than I thought I would, possibly just because of how much I really enjoy that feeling of teamwork, communication, and camaraderie.
Not to mention I am having a general annoyance with myself for not finishing projects started ages ago. My aunt is (with justification) nagging me that I should sort out getting my cats imported, and even the car guards are nagging me that I should get the window fixed in my car (someone broke a window over a month ago and I still haven’t gotten it fixed). It was only after about a week of no internet at home when my old contract expired and, what, a year and a half of paying pre-paid mobile rates because I didn’t want to take the time and the hassle of a credit check to go on a contract with one of the local phone companies before I finally dealt with the situation.
Yep, I have a definite procrastination problem. Wayne Gretzky would not approve. But of course, when things are a mission it’s so easy to get caught up in all the little things you can busy yourself with. And, we are all masters at rationalising our own behaviour right? But at the same time, it’s always easy to prioritise what you want to do or what is easier over what is a pain in the neck. Having a smashed car window has some definite advantages. The main reason I’m getting it fixed now is that the rainy season is coming. Maybe one of these years I’ll be mature enough NOT to wait until things actually come crashing down before I motivate.
Yeah, and maybe I’ll start drinking a bottle of wine a night, again, too. Talk about dulling the senses.
I remember when Jobst & Roland were first trying to get me to train less frequently and sleep more. Telling me flat out had the opposite effect: ‘Screw you guys, I don’t need to do that, I’ll do what I want!’ Kinda like I was saying in the last post, I’m sure they could both happily say ‘I told you so’ but the important thing is that somewhere along the line I figured it out for myself. I wonder how many times we act against our own self-interest just because we don’t like being told what to do? Well there are enough cognitive biases out there, hey a day we don’t screw something up is never going to happen.
As I’ve said before to get someone, including yourself, to do something, you need to have and exploit an intrinsic motivation. And the line between motivating and manipulating is a grey one, huh? So the real question is, how do I learn how to manipulate myself? Or even more basic than that – what is the pattern for when I do break out of procrastination and actually take action? What is different? Geez I wish I knew, because I’d get a hell of a lot more done. In a way, it’s probably as simple as just committing. 
It was funny though. The process of signing up for things like mobile phone contracts just takes so long. I swear it was at least 45 minutes the first day and 45 minutes the second day. And they still get it wrong (no data on my phone and my internet isn’t working because they never RICAd the SIM chip). And ordering the glass for the car? Yeah I could bitch about that too, but actually these things don’t really bother me. They just are what they are. What I resent is the opportunity cost, but hey, part of life is the drag, right? Next up is the monumental mission of calling the 45+ cargo companies that fly out of Boston to survey them on rates & pet handling policies. God help us all.
Speaking of Boston and God help us all, I had quite a laugh the other day when I walked into a local store called Sportsman’s Warehouse and saw a huge poster of Tom Brady (an Under Armour ad). At first I didn’t think much of it. Then I did a double-take, and actually started commenting out loud to the person I was with (who of course had NO idea who Tom Brady was). I just had to laugh out loud. Tom Brady reduced to a fashion model. Wow.
I would say that my biggest achievement of the week was finishing up a time sheet system, as well as some drafts of some marketing collateral and contracts, all of which had been on my to-do list for ages and ages. I also played web developer, which was sort of fun and sort of annoying. Jack of all trades, master of none. One of these months I’d like to be able to do my actual day job.
Happy to report that both my ankle and back/side injuries are much improved (even Dr Lan says so, which means it must be so!). In the team workout Tuesday night we had to do heavy (24kg) kettlebell swings. I was a bit apprehensive at first because that puts strain on the lower back and I hadn’t swung a heavy kettlebell since October, before I got that massive injury (big muscles take a looooong time to heal). But not only did it feel fine, but that kettlebell felt SUPER light in comparison to how it once did. I guess that’s what happens when you don’t practice something for 4 months but get a lot fitter in that time period. It was also my first time doing rope climbs since the ankle sprain, and those also were fine if inefficient because I haven’t had a chance to practice my technique obviously.
But I guess it’s just one of those up-and-down weeks. I get stuff done, don’t get other stuff done, and just generally laugh at myself. Monday’s challenge was funny because it was overhead squats (which are one of my weaknesses) and toes to bar, which I most definitely did NOT feel like doing after Saturday. I was quite happy that I managed to get all my rounds of overhead squats unbroken (for me this is a HUGE accomplishment), and I was literally laughing at myself after about round #4 when I could no longer grip the bar to do the toes-to-bar. I told my judge: ‘Yeah, this is where it all falls apart.’
This morning I had a somewhat disappointing max for day effort at overhead squat followed by an 8kg PR on front squat (I KNEW those percent lifts were far too easy), followed by a few mental fails. Then I learned what workout 12.4 is, which contains three of my weaknesses all wrapped up into a cute little package. Oh well, it is what it is, right? Laugh a bit, suck it up, and move on.

The quote in my friend’s email signature was a good slogan for the week: “Take your work seriously, but never yourself.” – Booth Tarkington
  • “That was amazing, by the way.” – Chris
  • “I can see that you’re tired.” – Jeff
  • “I’m very interested to see your reactions to what we’re about to experience.” – Anton
  • “If a monkey runs around and breaks all your plates, you can’t very well be angry at the monkey.” – Peter
  • “I think that happened a year ago.” – Mandy
  • “Have fun with the muscle ups.” – Roland (LOVE that positive attitude!)

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